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The Kick-Ass movie Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World

August 16, 2010

I saw Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World last night. It was kick ass. It wasn’t Kick Ass though, that was a much better movie in my opinion. No one is going to see either of these movies, but trust me, they’re both worth your money (or worth your thirty seconds of Google searching “watch *insert movie here* online”, finding the letmewatchthis.com link, and finding a streaming video that doesn’t suck too bad).

Scott Pilgrim was not what you would expect. Think arcade style game but in movie form. Weird to imagine, but this guy has to fight guys to date this girl and there’s things like flaming swords and insane punches and combos and words on the screen and it sounds weird (and it is) but they pull it off really well. Unique. If you’re anything like me it’s worth the money. It’s not all just arcade wonder either, it’s actually not a bad movie once you get past the video game stuff. Better than some of the other crap I’ve watched at least. So go out and support it.

Ok, politics. So. This movie gave me an idea. Politics suck. A lot. Debates are just two idiots being condescending to each other. Races become more about who raises the most money. Campaigns are becoming less and less about the message and more and more about a popularity contest. I got a letter in the letter this week from a local candidate running for, well, something, and it wouldn’t shut up about “Conservative” and “God” and stuff like that. On the back in a small box there was a two or three sentence write up about how he stands on the issues. I can barely even tell what the guy believes in, which is what I elect my representatives based upon.

If I had to boil down my main issues into three distinct parts it’d be foreign policy, domestic policy, and stay the hell out of the citizen’s way policy. So here’s what we do. We hold primary elections as they are now. Then, instead of holding a regular election, we stage a Street Fighter style fight to the death. Why, you ask? Well, because when it comes down to foreign policy, I like my leaders to be able to kick some ass. When it comes to domestic policy, I like my leaders to be able to kick some ass. And, thanks to the primary elections, the people can pick the candidates that have their best interests in mind and won’t abuse their power. In the end, the president emerges victorious, his opponent at his feet, ready to open a can of whoop-ass on enemies of America both here and abroad.

Don’t bother trying to point out flaws in my system. If you do then you’re just jealous that you didn’t think of this first.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. RationalPerson permalink
    August 16, 2010 3:03 pm

    Please don’t procreate.

    • August 16, 2010 3:54 pm

      You know, I was thinking about procreating at some point in my life, but your comment has made me stop and think. Let me explain myself. First, your name is “RationalPerson”. When they hand out screen names, as I assume that they do, they wouldn’t just hand out a descriptive one like that without doing a little research. So, when you make a comment such as the one above, I’m going to assume that you’ve thought this out on a logical basis. Otherwise, why would you call yourself “RationalPerson”?” Secondly, your email address is “fuck@you.com”. Obviously you’re not afraid to voice your strong, potentially vulgar, and clearly rationally thought out opinions. Thirdly, you said please in your comment. A little niceness goes a long way, especially in this case, and it helped me take what my spam filter flagged as “Spam” a little more seriously. Obviously you have my best interests in mind. Due to these reasons and the fact that you have obviously taken time out of your busy schedule to click around and do some typing and rationally argue for my sterility, I am thoroughly impressed. So thoroughly impressed, in fact, that I will be undergoing an emergency vasectomy tomorrow. I sincerely want to thank you for your concern over my potential offspring, the rationality of your argument, your kindness in this issue, and your overall opinion. Please continue to read the blog and be sure to share your enlightening insights whenever you deem appropriate.

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