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Redskins, the Patriots, and Terrorism

July 2, 2010

I came up with a good metaphor in the shower the other day. Ok, so I’m (sadly) a Washington Redskins fan. Which is really not good. I don’t know how many of you out there watch football, but they sort of suck. A lot. It’s embarrassing.

You know what team I hate? The Patriots. They started to screw up a little bit recently, but think back to about 2007. They were almost unstoppable. I can’t hate Tom Brady like I used to because he was on Family Guy and Entourage and I can’t hate anyone who was on both of those shows as a guest, but still, I hate The Patriots. Why? Because they’re too good. I’m jealous I guess. It’s frustrating.

Now lets pretend I’m a pissed off Muslim terrorist. Bear with me. I’m rooting for a team (the Middle East,  Islam, that sort of thing) that is far worse than the Redskins. In fact,  back in 1991 the Redskins had an AMAZING team. You want to know the last amazing Islam team? back in the 1400s. If I was Muslim I’d be pretty pissed at the people crushing us too (America, the free world, secularism, that sort of thing). Now I’m not saying I’m going to go fatwa on the Patriots, and I’m not saying we shouldn’t go kill all of the terrorists we can, all I’m saying is that I understand where they’re coming from. That said, let’s go get us our 100 terrorist scalps. And I want my scalps.

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